A Clean Death

Story by Long

An accident occured at 2345, Thursday, 28 June, at Blk 537, Serangoon North Ave 4. A bar of soap, age 4 days, fell to its death into a toilet bowl. Rescue attempts cannot be mounted as the toilet bowl has not been flushed. Police have ruled out possible foul play and classified the case as death due to misadventure.

"We tried to mount an immediate rescue attempt, but the water was too deep and murky. Random objects floating around complicated possible search attempts. In addition the water's toxicity ruled out any human contact with it", commented police spokesman Huang Yulong, who was incidentally also the only witness at the scene.

The public is cautioned to avoid grasping wet soap bars too hard and to flush immediately after toilet bowl usage. Although this is a freak accident, to be forewarned is to be forearmed.

-Rooters